Dr. Conway Edwards, Lead Pastor
Bible References: Matthew 22:35-40
Two important statistics that could help you make and keep a God inspired decision about your relationship:
- On average, 1 out of 2 married couples get a divorce: 50%
- However, of couples that pray together, only 1 in 10,000 get a divorce
To ensure your relationship achieves success, first be honest about and aware of why you chose your mate. Do not allow the stresses you experience to be greater than the reason you chose to get married.
Each of the reasons below that can be the basis of a person getting married lead to the one in two, 50% that get divorced.
- Share the money – You have more financial together than apart
- Aging – Fears about…the “biological clock” (i.e. I want a baby); being alone; professional image
- Soul-mate – You “feel” in love, which drives the “feeling” that the person is your true match
- Parental “fix-up” – My mother or father recommended the person
- Physical attraction – The person looks good; they fulfill the image you have of the “right” looking mate
- Share life – You want to create a life together with the person
- Rebound – Your former boyfriend or girlfriend gets married, and you want to show them you’re still wanted by others, so you marry the next person
To overcome these reasons and achieve lasting success in your marriage you must be attentive to four “P’s” – purpose, pride, pattern, and prayer.
- Have one purpose: What is the purpose of marriage? To bring God glory. He wants us to demonstrate what the trinity looks like when we are selfless in serving each other. The test of every marriage’s integrity is its survival despite life’s stresses. Ask yourself if you got married for you or to display God’s glory. We show the world what marriage looks like when we don’t get our way but we pour on the love.
- Bridle your pride: Fundamental problem – our pride. Life happens and we select what is pleasing to us vs. what God wants. We must recognize that we exist to please the ones He has blessed us with. Once in Christ, we no longer exist to please ourselves. The same way we measure satisfying our self is the same way we should measure satisfying others.
- Change the pattern: Marriage requires recognition as individuals and as a unified couple that our purpose is to glorify God. We have three functions: spiritual – our relationship with God, soul – how we relate to others, body – how we relate to the world. Our decisions must come from God being our priority. God is most glorified in you when you are most satisfied in Him.
- Pray together: If you do one thing, it is to invite the Lord to cover your union. Keeping God as the focal point in your lives provides the scaffolding to support and strengthen your marriage.